350.org were promoting a day of action on climate change for 10/10/10, so we felt this was a good day to try our own local community building exercise. We were not able to prepare for a big event, and the weather forecast was not good, so we opted for a simple meet and greet with the locals, to talk about food, gardening and getting to know each other. So we letter dropped the two streets that make up our little corner of the suburb, about 40 houses, inviting them to our back yard for a morning tea.
Considering we had an absolutely terrible day with weather, it was a better day than we expected! Its been raining solid for the last three days, everything is soaked through, plus the wind has come up and its cold and miserable, back to winter! We really didn’t expect anyone to turn up, but they came. A dozen households came, people we’ve not met before, some we’ve just said hi to on the street, a couple we knew. Two lively ladies in their nineties who were a treasure trove of local history. A good first experiment with a very localised community/street gathering, worth the effort.
It got me to thinking about what community is.
What is “community”?
I often wonder why I’m spending time here, starting to talk about building communities. I’m not qualified to do so, I’ve not studies any social sciences, I’m no expert on psychology, I’m not even a very social person. I hate being the center of attention, awkward at gatherings, always lost for words – certainly not leadership material, never understood why anyone would want to be a leader. And I’m not even sure I really know what being in a communityreally means.
But I have read a lot, and worried a lot, about the future. Time and time again a thread emerges for me from those readings, and it has to do with interconnections and interdependence. And often this is expressed as community. If we were talking about natural systems I guess you would call it ecology. But defining “what is community” is like all definitions a little tricky sometimes, because there is the “point of view” clouding things. So I started thinking, what isn’t community, and what might people mistake for community. So lets try that.
‘Myself’ is obviously not ‘a community’ other than in the biological sense of all the living things that make up me. I’m quite happy with my little world, my little world view, and the beliefs I hold dear. Its totally myopic, but fairly benign. Its also singularly selfish, which is just the way ego must be unfortunately. My responsibility is just to me. Sometimes that is not so benign.
‘My Family’ is not ‘a community’. Its something much more contained, with just a couple of relationships that have very strongly biased bonds. There are strong implied responsibilities and dependencies that cannot be ignored, which means you can be ‘yourself’ within ‘your family’ and mostly be tolerated. But your family is not a community, and I think that is why intentional communities based on a “family” concept can be successful, but pretty restrictive and isolated. The responsibilities and dependencies are extremely tight and cannot be ignored. ‘Family comes first’ it is often said.
‘My friends’ are not a community. They have been selected based on various criteria that suit me. There is some variability, but many commonalties, which are needed for the bond of friendship. There are shared responsibilities and dependencies too, but mostly voluntarily entered into. Mostly though I choose my friends because they are reasonably compatible with my ego, my sense of self. But friends can come and go, fall out or lose track.
A ‘church group’, ‘political party’ or ‘club’ is not a community. These groups have a particular world view that demands a loyalty to that group, and these form a dependency based on an ideology. It is selective in nature, based on some arbitrary criteria. Sometimes its a belief system that tries to dominate others, sometimes a world view that places preference on one group of people over another, sometimes its just a belief that one sort of thing or way is better than another. It is often by definition and design not inclusive, but exclusive. It can feel a bit like a community when then size is large, but its not quite. Which is why I feel intentional communities based on an ideology could be unwelcoming for many people. They can work, and do, as a family based group can work, but its not really a true community in my mind.
So, what is left then to call ‘a community’. We often would use that word with some of the above. I think the definition is in what is left out. I think what makes ‘a community’ is simply the people who live around you, those that you interact with on a daily basis, or ignore on a daily basis, but they are there. And the difference is that on the whole in our westernised worlds, there is very little truly shared responsibilities or dependencies, except maybe in times of emergency. If you don’t talk to the person two house down the street, it really doesn’t have much impact on either of you does it? The person five doors down that plays thrash metal at 3am, you’re quite happy to have nothing to do with them, but they are part of your community too.
Which brings me to why defining “what a community is” as so hard, because to do so it has to included everyone around you, especially the ones you might not like, or that have different world views, or that are part of some select club, cult/religion or political party. The single most difficult part of dealing with ‘community’ is that it includes the ones you’d rather avoid! That’s a bitter pill to swallow isn’t it. I think I’ve talked myself around to having to rename this site! But maybe not. Maybe I’m just defining it from one narrow perspective, and its all in the semantics.
But the thrust of this ramble is to point out that ‘a community’ needs to be inclusive of everyone physically in it, like it or not. That doesn’t mean we have to invite the thrash metal guy to dinner, but just that when we talk about community we have to try to remember its bigger than us, our families, our friends, or our groups. Our ‘semi-intentional communities’ are really ‘semi-intentional-clubs-for-like-minded-people-interesting-in-sustainability-and-simple-ethical-living’ located within a community.
And managing those edge interactions seems to be a big aspect of success or failure maybe.
So I’m thinking that community is a bit like ‘the edge’ in permaculture. That is where a lot of the interesting stuff happens, where the really authentic interactions occurs because its the place where predefined responsibilities and dependencies are at their weakest, which means it also takes a lot of extra effort to control how things work at this level, but the possibilities are much greater too maybe. Its also the most complex set of interactions, and the least within our control. In our modern lives we don’t really need to commit to these interactions, which was once not a option if you wanted to survive. Now we can mostly avoid these inconvenient interactions, but at the price maybe of a strong community?
Community is certainly a tricky subject to pin down. We all have a bit of a view of what we think it might look like, some romantic notions, but that is almost always our personal view, and it tends to leave out the awkward bits around interacting with those you don’t necessarily want to interact with, or dealing with these elements when things don’t go our way. I know who I want in ‘my group’ but I can’t apply this same logic to ‘my community’. They are there, the good, the bad, and the ugly, and that is why I think the success of community is underpinned by respect for each other over everything else. Of course, that is easier to say than implement, but that’s another story.
Also, I could be wrong.
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